Omg yesterday night I had this FREAKING weird dream. I dream I was visited by this ang mo lao zha bor. Then she tell me she need to collect a piece of my flesh to prove to Hades (her Lao ban) that I was son of Zeus. Then she pried open my mouth and took a piece of flesh from the roof of my mouth. Using knife somemore lehh! Wa lau eh, want to take flesh okay lah, ask first lah then can take all my fats away mah, best is take all. Then she fly out of my window siah. Damn epic, my window got grille one then she flew and bang into the grille. Okay lah not really her fault also lols, cause I never open mah. The best thing is that when I woke up right, that part of my flesh was really missing siah. Zomggggg. The roof of my mouth is missing!! (ok lah only a small piece, but still!!!)
Okay anyway, I'm thinking if I should join NRA cause it's like so cool. But I scared I not cool enough to join this cool CCA siah hahaha. Maybe I should just stick to HI club siah. Tomorrow I'm ushering for the DiD opening. :D And then Japanese lessons at night! I think BHG will be waiting for me. Everyone say awwww.
*awwwww*
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Early bird catches the worm?
I think not!!
Yesterday, I woke up a little later and caught the later bus to school. So today, I decided to be a good boy and wake up a little earlier. Hahaha. I set my alarm to ring at 6:50am but in the end I press snooze all the way until 7:20am. At that point of time I was like 'omfg shit shit shit shit!!!' then I jumped out of bed and chiong to my toilet. Hahaha then I pratically tore my clothes off me. Like HULK you know!
"Shawnee ANGRY!!!!!" *tears clothes off*
Then I put the shower to max and went to pee for a moment first while waiting for the water to heat up. Then I jumped straight into the gushing stream of steaming water to bathe. Which of course I regretted. The water was freaking 'steaming' you know!!! Omfg, I practically screamed as my tender body was being cooked like those White chicken that are sold at chicken rice stalls. I bet it was my stupid sister lah. Omg jealous of my beautiful skin so she wanted to scald me.
So anyway, I continued bathing and shampooed by the way I use some ba Wang shampoo. The one tha jackie chan endorses. I swear it stinks like a rotting maggot swimming in a pool of sweat. Even the colour come out is like those brownish Lao sai colour. Eeeeeewww. I want the clairol herbal essence coconut milk one. That way when I wash my hair, after wash finish will smell like nasi lemak. So awesome can, nasi lemak smelling hair. If I put chicken wing and chilli then can really eat as set meal already.
So after bathing, I went to check what time bus 52 will leave the interchange. It would leave at around 7:45am. So I message jojo to so she knows. At that time was around 7:30am and I was nude in my room typing a SMS hahahaha. I suddenly stoned for a full five minutes hahaha. Like seriously stand in my room naked and stare into space. Then I suddenly jerked, woke up and thrashed my cupboard for clothes. So at this point of time I had like 10 mins to dress up, leave house and chiong to the bus interchange. Which I did. Omg, I'm so proud of myself for managing this inhumane feat siah. So I got on the bus and at te interchange, there were already no more free seats left. Luckily I got one seat. So as the bus left the interchange, I messaged jojo that the bus arriving already. Then she still slowly take her time to walk to the bus stop. Then when the bus was reaching her bus stop, she still haven't reach yet. Hahaha. Then when the bus was about to leave her bus stop, I decided to do something damn spastic. I jumped out from my seat and press the bell. Then I walked to the exit and just stand there as though I was going to alight but never alight lah. Hahaha. Wa lau then I stand there like a complete idiot. Giving up my seat for nothing somemore lol. There was this awkward silence in the bus and I could feel the eyes of all the people on the bus trailing on my back lah. I was so paiseh, I dare not to look back lol.
So after that jojo found a seat and didn't even have the courtesy to offer the seat to me lah. Hahahahahaha
Okay so after that reach school, we parted our ways and I went to the class venue at blk 56. I was damn happy because today I reached school damn early then for once won't be late. When I was at the classroom, none of my classmates have arrived yet, so I was secretly happy that I was the first to arrive but then the happiness was short lived lah. 2 of the girls from my class came and they were like tweedle dee and tweedle dum. You know those 2 idiotic twins from alice in wonderland? Hahaha so funny lah. Then I checked MeL and found out today got no tutorials!! WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!
So that means I woke up so early, struggled in bed, left my dear bed bed alone at home for NOTHING. wa lau. That's why I'm here at makan place, bored and typing this stupid blogpost. OMG I just realized something. I never wear my blue watch today. ): I'm so sad.
Anyways here is a little something!
Thanks to Dione Quek for creating that awesome group! Now the rest also follow and create fan groups already, you pioneer the trend leh. Proud or not? :D Ya xun for spazzing in the group and joy for writing what is on the left side of the page. All you three get free subway cookies. Hahahaha like srsly. Free cookies hahaha. Ain't that dainty!!! <3 to you peeps!!! If all no opinions then the cookies shall be white chip, cause that's the best flavour ever.
Shawnee signing off from makan place!
Yesterday, I woke up a little later and caught the later bus to school. So today, I decided to be a good boy and wake up a little earlier. Hahaha. I set my alarm to ring at 6:50am but in the end I press snooze all the way until 7:20am. At that point of time I was like 'omfg shit shit shit shit!!!' then I jumped out of bed and chiong to my toilet. Hahaha then I pratically tore my clothes off me. Like HULK you know!
"Shawnee ANGRY!!!!!" *tears clothes off*
Then I put the shower to max and went to pee for a moment first while waiting for the water to heat up. Then I jumped straight into the gushing stream of steaming water to bathe. Which of course I regretted. The water was freaking 'steaming' you know!!! Omfg, I practically screamed as my tender body was being cooked like those White chicken that are sold at chicken rice stalls. I bet it was my stupid sister lah. Omg jealous of my beautiful skin so she wanted to scald me.
So anyway, I continued bathing and shampooed by the way I use some ba Wang shampoo. The one tha jackie chan endorses. I swear it stinks like a rotting maggot swimming in a pool of sweat. Even the colour come out is like those brownish Lao sai colour. Eeeeeewww. I want the clairol herbal essence coconut milk one. That way when I wash my hair, after wash finish will smell like nasi lemak. So awesome can, nasi lemak smelling hair. If I put chicken wing and chilli then can really eat as set meal already.
So after bathing, I went to check what time bus 52 will leave the interchange. It would leave at around 7:45am. So I message jojo to so she knows. At that time was around 7:30am and I was nude in my room typing a SMS hahahaha. I suddenly stoned for a full five minutes hahaha. Like seriously stand in my room naked and stare into space. Then I suddenly jerked, woke up and thrashed my cupboard for clothes. So at this point of time I had like 10 mins to dress up, leave house and chiong to the bus interchange. Which I did. Omg, I'm so proud of myself for managing this inhumane feat siah. So I got on the bus and at te interchange, there were already no more free seats left. Luckily I got one seat. So as the bus left the interchange, I messaged jojo that the bus arriving already. Then she still slowly take her time to walk to the bus stop. Then when the bus was reaching her bus stop, she still haven't reach yet. Hahaha. Then when the bus was about to leave her bus stop, I decided to do something damn spastic. I jumped out from my seat and press the bell. Then I walked to the exit and just stand there as though I was going to alight but never alight lah. Hahaha. Wa lau then I stand there like a complete idiot. Giving up my seat for nothing somemore lol. There was this awkward silence in the bus and I could feel the eyes of all the people on the bus trailing on my back lah. I was so paiseh, I dare not to look back lol.
So after that jojo found a seat and didn't even have the courtesy to offer the seat to me lah. Hahahahahaha
Okay so after that reach school, we parted our ways and I went to the class venue at blk 56. I was damn happy because today I reached school damn early then for once won't be late. When I was at the classroom, none of my classmates have arrived yet, so I was secretly happy that I was the first to arrive but then the happiness was short lived lah. 2 of the girls from my class came and they were like tweedle dee and tweedle dum. You know those 2 idiotic twins from alice in wonderland? Hahaha so funny lah. Then I checked MeL and found out today got no tutorials!! WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!
So that means I woke up so early, struggled in bed, left my dear bed bed alone at home for NOTHING. wa lau. That's why I'm here at makan place, bored and typing this stupid blogpost. OMG I just realized something. I never wear my blue watch today. ): I'm so sad.
Anyways here is a little something!
Thanks to Dione Quek for creating that awesome group! Now the rest also follow and create fan groups already, you pioneer the trend leh. Proud or not? :D Ya xun for spazzing in the group and joy for writing what is on the left side of the page. All you three get free subway cookies. Hahahaha like srsly. Free cookies hahaha. Ain't that dainty!!! <3 to you peeps!!! If all no opinions then the cookies shall be white chip, cause that's the best flavour ever.
Shawnee signing off from makan place!
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Toilet Trauma.
Disclaimer: This blog post is not for the faint hearted. It contain gore and gruesome details that might not be suitable for minors, pregnant ladies or anyone suffering from any physical sickness. I shall not be held responsible for any lifetime trauma or permanent loss of appetite. If you, the reader, agrees to the above, feel free to share the traumatizing experience that I had.
And so I woke up this morning, doing nothing but the usual. Turning on the computer, signing on to MSN, and then taking a bathe or maybe a dump. And I decided to do both today. So after going about my business, I did a clean wipe and made sure my ass was spanking clean. Then I laid down the lid of Sir flush-a-lot and flushed. Then I turned on the shower tap and started bathing. Then I noticed something strange. Something that had happened before. Horror struck me as I slowly pryed open the lid of Sir flush-a-lot to find it filled to rim's edge of dark-brown murky sewage, garnished with bits and pieces of toilet paper. Just like parsley bits in ramen soup. Only this ISN'T ramen soup. This reminded me of the scene in Dogma, where a demon forms from excrement spilling from a never-ending overflowing toilet bowl.
Desperate, I waited for the tide to subside in it before flushing again. Yet again the satisfactory burp of Sir flush-a-lot after consuming its contents was not heard. I immediately went to Google for help. Looking those the "Art of Manliness", I saw the first solution was to use a plunger. Sounds fair enough. Braving harmful microbes and the foul stench, I took up my weapon of choice and headed to the battlefield.
With my fingers grasp tightly around the pole of my weapon, I began pumping and plunging with motion that I'm all so familiar with. WRONG MOVE. Apparently the harder I plunged, the higher the "water" level rose. Well, you can't really call it "water" now... it was more of "Toxic concoction". A sound emanated from the Sir flush-a-lot that could strike fear, deep into the hearts of mortal men.
BLORP SQUAHS BLUURRPPs
GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!
So it was back to the drawing board. Second step in the "Art of Manliness" was to use a wired coat hanger. "Damn", I thought to myself. "If this doesn't do the trick, I don't know what does." So I went to my clothes closet and took out a wired coat hanger. "Sorry." I muttered, for I knew what horrible future awaits this poor coat hanger. I proceeded to unwind the coat hanger and straightened it out with a little curve at the end. I took a second to have a good look at the weapon in my hand and said a silent prayer. Brandishing a new weapon, I stormed into the battlefield once more. I took a deep breath (Of harmful microbes and stinky air) and plunged my weapon deep within the belly of the beast. I swirled my weapon around and made a few powerful jabs and thrusts, but that did nothing much other than stir up a cloud of "ramen ingredients".
Utterly discouraged, I discarded the weapon in my hand and referred back to the "Art of Manliness". Apparently there were 2 other methods. The chemical route, which involved acid and plumber.
Well, as I'm deciding on how to go about slaying the beast that lay dormant deep within the abyss, I've officially quarantined the toilet indefinitely. Tired, weary and hungry as I was, I just couldn't find my appetite. I wonder why. I would have attached a few pictures into the blog post too, but I've decided that it would be far too graphic for this family-oriented blog. Stay tuned for more updates!
And so I woke up this morning, doing nothing but the usual. Turning on the computer, signing on to MSN, and then taking a bathe or maybe a dump. And I decided to do both today. So after going about my business, I did a clean wipe and made sure my ass was spanking clean. Then I laid down the lid of Sir flush-a-lot and flushed. Then I turned on the shower tap and started bathing. Then I noticed something strange. Something that had happened before. Horror struck me as I slowly pryed open the lid of Sir flush-a-lot to find it filled to rim's edge of dark-brown murky sewage, garnished with bits and pieces of toilet paper. Just like parsley bits in ramen soup. Only this ISN'T ramen soup. This reminded me of the scene in Dogma, where a demon forms from excrement spilling from a never-ending overflowing toilet bowl.
Desperate, I waited for the tide to subside in it before flushing again. Yet again the satisfactory burp of Sir flush-a-lot after consuming its contents was not heard. I immediately went to Google for help. Looking those the "Art of Manliness", I saw the first solution was to use a plunger. Sounds fair enough. Braving harmful microbes and the foul stench, I took up my weapon of choice and headed to the battlefield.
With my fingers grasp tightly around the pole of my weapon, I began pumping and plunging with motion that I'm all so familiar with. WRONG MOVE. Apparently the harder I plunged, the higher the "water" level rose. Well, you can't really call it "water" now... it was more of "Toxic concoction". A sound emanated from the Sir flush-a-lot that could strike fear, deep into the hearts of mortal men.
BLORP SQUAHS BLUURRPPs
GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!
So it was back to the drawing board. Second step in the "Art of Manliness" was to use a wired coat hanger. "Damn", I thought to myself. "If this doesn't do the trick, I don't know what does." So I went to my clothes closet and took out a wired coat hanger. "Sorry." I muttered, for I knew what horrible future awaits this poor coat hanger. I proceeded to unwind the coat hanger and straightened it out with a little curve at the end. I took a second to have a good look at the weapon in my hand and said a silent prayer. Brandishing a new weapon, I stormed into the battlefield once more. I took a deep breath (Of harmful microbes and stinky air) and plunged my weapon deep within the belly of the beast. I swirled my weapon around and made a few powerful jabs and thrusts, but that did nothing much other than stir up a cloud of "ramen ingredients".
Utterly discouraged, I discarded the weapon in my hand and referred back to the "Art of Manliness". Apparently there were 2 other methods. The chemical route, which involved acid and plumber.
Well, as I'm deciding on how to go about slaying the beast that lay dormant deep within the abyss, I've officially quarantined the toilet indefinitely. Tired, weary and hungry as I was, I just couldn't find my appetite. I wonder why. I would have attached a few pictures into the blog post too, but I've decided that it would be far too graphic for this family-oriented blog. Stay tuned for more updates!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Happy Birthday to me.
I share the same birthday with 2 other friends of mine, Cheryl Loh and Elaine Lim. Coincidentally Elaine Lim was born in 1992, I was born in 1991 and Cheryl was born in 1990. Cool eh?
Anyway, on the stroke of midnight on 6 September 2009, my sister came in with a 2 dollar vanilla cake from NTUC, covered in some chocolatey fudge which she claims she made (I highly doubt so). Since we didn't have candles, she took wooden chopsticks broke it into a 5 cm stick and then super heated it till it was glowing with red ambers. Then she brought it in while I was in the midst of my gaming escapade, and place it on my mouspad. I was like "SCREW YOU! I CAN'T MOVE MY MOUSE!" Then I said "ok ok, thank you thank you, you put down first later I eat. And wtf is that chopstick doing on the cake?" After a few bites of the cake, it went back to the deep cold abyss of the fridge and I slept.
okay so I slept till around 11am. Then I woke up and went to toilet to pee. Pee and pee and pee and pee and pee. After that I went groggily to my computer and pressed the on button and was greeted by the montonous, mundane voice of Microsoft Sam singing happy birthday to me. So as usual, I scanned my face into the computer and logged on. Checked my email and was pleasantly greeted with Happy birthdays by my facebook friends and an automated computer generated happy birthday from a forum I visited. To tell you the truth, I was happy that even one person remembered my birthday. Ya, that's how pathetic my life is. FML. I didn't really have any plans for my birthday. It's really hard to ask friends out when the JC2 are having their prelims and JC1 are mugging as if studying about the law of diminishing returns was only thing exciting about their lives.
So as usual, I began the day browsing SgClub, and logging on to Garena to play Blackshot (I'm seriously getting better at sniping) and DotA. Oh well, at least Vanessa (The character I play in Blackshot), is actually quite cute and they made her character model quite hot. And there's always the busty and lusty Lina Inverse in DotA trying to seduce me to "Oh behave~!" Seriously though, no that much of my friends in my social circle are that on. Either that or they are seriously too 'guai'. Not the kind you can call up to ask to meet and they'll be there in 1 hour. But that's okay with me, I have my computer to see me through. I could have sex with my computer through the USB ports for all I care. Though PS/2 ports would be better since they are circular in shape while USB are squares.
So the time now is 4pm and I'm staring at the dangerous curves of my Razer Copperhead mouse, fantasizing about Megan Fox. My phone vibrates, I'm thinking it is some stupid SMS from Singtel reminding me of some kickass promotion or something. But it isn't. It is a call. My friend See Ler, probably the horniest guy in CJC, calls me up to drink at some pub at Somerset. My grip tightened around my handphone. Still tainted with the memory traces of our last pub trip, I said "Are you sure it won't end up like last time?" After much assurance, I decided to go. So with godlike speed, punctuality and exactness, I bathe, changed and reached Somerset by 5pm. We went into some pub called "Acid Bar". Where there were 3 girls sitting on the sofa. I was reminded of Charlie Angels immediately. Imagine how nice if they were to greet me with "Hi Charlie~" or maybe "Hi Shawniee~" for a personal touch. Oh well, fantasies aside, there were also on guy. So there were 5 CJC peeps and one NP peep. Sitting in the bar, drinking alcohol.
So we played truth or dare and I bloody tio 3 times. I think 2 truths and one dare. I remember one truth was to say that this girl "Claudia" had really bad teeth and like the teeth were razor-sharp and would slice your d**k off if she gave anyone a bj. LOL! I can't believe I said that to a girl, that I've barely spoke 10 sentences with. But it was all in jest and probably in drunken stupor. So no hard feelings!! Just for laughs!. The bar manager apparently was extrememly short. He was probably midget sized, lingering near the edge of becoming an oompa loompa (The beings that work for willy wonka.) So See Ler was massively spamming and shouting, "Wah lau eh that midget manager" and stuff like that. I probably said "midget!" louder than I should a few times too but I think I toned down abit later. But See Ler, that alcoholic kept spouting "MIDGET! MIDGET!" So when it came to a my dare, I was supposed to do some bartop dancing or something to seduce the midget manager. So I was all touching myself and doing seductive moves. Apparently there is a video of me dancing floating around the net, but I shan't show you all. I already have a immensely large collection dance videos of me and I'm not exactly proud of it. But neither am I ashamed hahaha! Oh yeah I ordered a Lime Magarita which costed me 15 bucks. WTF! 15 BUCKS! Hey but it was not bad...
So after that the CJC gang left, leaving me with See Ler. I feared the worst with See Ler, especially when he gets drunk like really easily. (I was told that once, he was so drunk, he laid on the grass asleep, and could not be awaken.) Thereafter, it was the CHS old boys party time. Humping and Melvin came. It was almost like some gay party. 4 guys at the pub drinking. I order 2 more bottles of Premium Lager A.K.A beer. After slacking and chilling for awhile more, we decided to go to Ion Orchard's Swensens to celebrate my birthday. As you know, alcohol has diuretic properties which causes you to really want to pee. Somerset was like around 400m to 500m from Ion Orchard, so I suggested that I go to Cineleisure to answer my call of nature, but I was met with active resistance of 3 men. They threatened to perform the Japanese water torture on me if I failed to comply. As you know, majority is always right so try as I might, Ion Orchard was the destination to be. So as we were walking by Takashimaya, there was some Lion Dance competition or some sort (?? It's not even chinese new year yet doh) and the 3 bastards, in evil unison, agreed that the Lion Dance competition was "extremely exciting, exhilarating, a must-see and eye candy that must not be missed. But after promising them that I won't marry Megan Fox (I still will! *evil grin*), they relented to my pitiful pleas to rush to Ion Orchard. Finally we went to Ion Orchard. I relieved myself and gave a HUGE sigh of relief.
The Swensens at Ion Orchard are seriously CMI. What the hell, its almost inaccessible from 90% of the places in Ion Orchard. It is closed off from the public. It's as if they are saying "Hey! Our venue is located at some dilapidated place which you stupid people out there will never find! Because you can't read directions!" Talk about discrimination. I wonder if some dumb oompa loompa was in charge of allocating the location of Swensens. It's like denying stupid people of being your customers. Imagine how much business you would lose!! I in Swensens I went, I ordered, some beef lasagne and shared Rodeo wings with humping. See Ler ordered fish&chips and kept complaining of getting a hangover. That stupid noob. Melvin ordered some Meatballs spaghetti thingy and humping ordered the megaburger. The megaburger actually looks quite cool. Might try it next time I go there. Finally it came to the dessert. I got some flaming birthday ice cream thingy on the house. There was supposed to be a candle in the middle but when the waiter came, the candle dropped into the ice cream and he bloody used his fingers to dig it out. EPIC FAIL. So he faster rush off and I just ate the ice cream anyway. The 3 bastards never order any desserts so they kept taking mine. And that bloody waiter no decency to say sorry or replace the candle or even say happy birthday. WAITER FAIL. After that we headed home. END OF BIRTHDAY ADVENTURE! =D
I'd love to talk about the time I went to Baybeats but I think this blogpost is getting a little too long, so I'll leave it for another time heh.
Anyway, on the stroke of midnight on 6 September 2009, my sister came in with a 2 dollar vanilla cake from NTUC, covered in some chocolatey fudge which she claims she made (I highly doubt so). Since we didn't have candles, she took wooden chopsticks broke it into a 5 cm stick and then super heated it till it was glowing with red ambers. Then she brought it in while I was in the midst of my gaming escapade, and place it on my mouspad. I was like "SCREW YOU! I CAN'T MOVE MY MOUSE!" Then I said "ok ok, thank you thank you, you put down first later I eat. And wtf is that chopstick doing on the cake?" After a few bites of the cake, it went back to the deep cold abyss of the fridge and I slept.
okay so I slept till around 11am. Then I woke up and went to toilet to pee. Pee and pee and pee and pee and pee. After that I went groggily to my computer and pressed the on button and was greeted by the montonous, mundane voice of Microsoft Sam singing happy birthday to me. So as usual, I scanned my face into the computer and logged on. Checked my email and was pleasantly greeted with Happy birthdays by my facebook friends and an automated computer generated happy birthday from a forum I visited. To tell you the truth, I was happy that even one person remembered my birthday. Ya, that's how pathetic my life is. FML. I didn't really have any plans for my birthday. It's really hard to ask friends out when the JC2 are having their prelims and JC1 are mugging as if studying about the law of diminishing returns was only thing exciting about their lives.
So as usual, I began the day browsing SgClub, and logging on to Garena to play Blackshot (I'm seriously getting better at sniping) and DotA. Oh well, at least Vanessa (The character I play in Blackshot), is actually quite cute and they made her character model quite hot. And there's always the busty and lusty Lina Inverse in DotA trying to seduce me to "Oh behave~!" Seriously though, no that much of my friends in my social circle are that on. Either that or they are seriously too 'guai'. Not the kind you can call up to ask to meet and they'll be there in 1 hour. But that's okay with me, I have my computer to see me through. I could have sex with my computer through the USB ports for all I care. Though PS/2 ports would be better since they are circular in shape while USB are squares.
So the time now is 4pm and I'm staring at the dangerous curves of my Razer Copperhead mouse, fantasizing about Megan Fox. My phone vibrates, I'm thinking it is some stupid SMS from Singtel reminding me of some kickass promotion or something. But it isn't. It is a call. My friend See Ler, probably the horniest guy in CJC, calls me up to drink at some pub at Somerset. My grip tightened around my handphone. Still tainted with the memory traces of our last pub trip, I said "Are you sure it won't end up like last time?" After much assurance, I decided to go. So with godlike speed, punctuality and exactness, I bathe, changed and reached Somerset by 5pm. We went into some pub called "Acid Bar". Where there were 3 girls sitting on the sofa. I was reminded of Charlie Angels immediately. Imagine how nice if they were to greet me with "Hi Charlie~" or maybe "Hi Shawniee~" for a personal touch. Oh well, fantasies aside, there were also on guy. So there were 5 CJC peeps and one NP peep. Sitting in the bar, drinking alcohol.
So we played truth or dare and I bloody tio 3 times. I think 2 truths and one dare. I remember one truth was to say that this girl "Claudia" had really bad teeth and like the teeth were razor-sharp and would slice your d**k off if she gave anyone a bj. LOL! I can't believe I said that to a girl, that I've barely spoke 10 sentences with. But it was all in jest and probably in drunken stupor. So no hard feelings!! Just for laughs!. The bar manager apparently was extrememly short. He was probably midget sized, lingering near the edge of becoming an oompa loompa (The beings that work for willy wonka.) So See Ler was massively spamming and shouting, "Wah lau eh that midget manager" and stuff like that. I probably said "midget!" louder than I should a few times too but I think I toned down abit later. But See Ler, that alcoholic kept spouting "MIDGET! MIDGET!" So when it came to a my dare, I was supposed to do some bartop dancing or something to seduce the midget manager. So I was all touching myself and doing seductive moves. Apparently there is a video of me dancing floating around the net, but I shan't show you all. I already have a immensely large collection dance videos of me and I'm not exactly proud of it. But neither am I ashamed hahaha! Oh yeah I ordered a Lime Magarita which costed me 15 bucks. WTF! 15 BUCKS! Hey but it was not bad...
So after that the CJC gang left, leaving me with See Ler. I feared the worst with See Ler, especially when he gets drunk like really easily. (I was told that once, he was so drunk, he laid on the grass asleep, and could not be awaken.) Thereafter, it was the CHS old boys party time. Humping and Melvin came. It was almost like some gay party. 4 guys at the pub drinking. I order 2 more bottles of Premium Lager A.K.A beer. After slacking and chilling for awhile more, we decided to go to Ion Orchard's Swensens to celebrate my birthday. As you know, alcohol has diuretic properties which causes you to really want to pee. Somerset was like around 400m to 500m from Ion Orchard, so I suggested that I go to Cineleisure to answer my call of nature, but I was met with active resistance of 3 men. They threatened to perform the Japanese water torture on me if I failed to comply. As you know, majority is always right so try as I might, Ion Orchard was the destination to be. So as we were walking by Takashimaya, there was some Lion Dance competition or some sort (?? It's not even chinese new year yet doh) and the 3 bastards, in evil unison, agreed that the Lion Dance competition was "extremely exciting, exhilarating, a must-see and eye candy that must not be missed. But after promising them that I won't marry Megan Fox (I still will! *evil grin*), they relented to my pitiful pleas to rush to Ion Orchard. Finally we went to Ion Orchard. I relieved myself and gave a HUGE sigh of relief.
The Swensens at Ion Orchard are seriously CMI. What the hell, its almost inaccessible from 90% of the places in Ion Orchard. It is closed off from the public. It's as if they are saying "Hey! Our venue is located at some dilapidated place which you stupid people out there will never find! Because you can't read directions!" Talk about discrimination. I wonder if some dumb oompa loompa was in charge of allocating the location of Swensens. It's like denying stupid people of being your customers. Imagine how much business you would lose!! I in Swensens I went, I ordered, some beef lasagne and shared Rodeo wings with humping. See Ler ordered fish&chips and kept complaining of getting a hangover. That stupid noob. Melvin ordered some Meatballs spaghetti thingy and humping ordered the megaburger. The megaburger actually looks quite cool. Might try it next time I go there. Finally it came to the dessert. I got some flaming birthday ice cream thingy on the house. There was supposed to be a candle in the middle but when the waiter came, the candle dropped into the ice cream and he bloody used his fingers to dig it out. EPIC FAIL. So he faster rush off and I just ate the ice cream anyway. The 3 bastards never order any desserts so they kept taking mine. And that bloody waiter no decency to say sorry or replace the candle or even say happy birthday. WAITER FAIL. After that we headed home. END OF BIRTHDAY ADVENTURE! =D
I'd love to talk about the time I went to Baybeats but I think this blogpost is getting a little too long, so I'll leave it for another time heh.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Booze teh night away.
Today was Red Camp SL interview day!! Well I guess it went ok... But there were really really alot of people that came to apply. Plus NP Ambassadors already took up many of the SL slots, so there is already very little slots to fight over with. Results will be out on Sep 11, on ambassadors.np.edu.sg Hopefully I did well enough to get into the Red Camp SL. Cause I know it'll be so damn fun and I'll get to meet alot of new friends :D
After that I went to library and looked at many of the failblog videos out there. Well it consoles me that there are plenty of failures out there in life other than me :)
Then I went to CJC. CJC not bad la, got a bit of chio girls here and there highly recommended by my dear friend See Ler who is probably the horniest guy in CJC. But whatever. Then we were supposed to go pubbing and drink the night away. Happy hour was from 5pm to 9pm and we were supposed to meet at 6pm. But NJC nerds had to take exams until 6:30pm? WTF. So in the end when the NJC nerd, Melvin, finally came to meet us at Orchard it was already 8:30pm. Left half an hour to closing time of happy hour. So we planned to chiong there fast and order like as many pints of beer as possible before happy hour over. But See Ler dressed like some kopi boy at kopitiam. Complete with shirt and CJC pe shorts. Then everyone at the pub was like so "cool". Long story short, we never got into the pub. In the end, we went to New York New york to order some exquisite new york cuisine.
See Ler, like a noob trying to act pro. Want to drink in the end have to go Cold Storage and buy beer. F**king noobshit. So in the end I got a bottle of Corona and See Ler got 2 cans of sapporo, one can of some weird brand and Carlsberg. I ordered Black pepper chicken chop spaghetti. I swear the bloody spaghetti sucks to the core and the chicken chop like those deep fried tempura cardboard you can find at KFC. The spaghetti like those rafia strings that scouts use to tie their rape victims to pole. After that chill at New York New York until closing time. Yuantat that noob shit. His hair long like thai transvestite pubic hair. Act japanese only. Like those noob otaku whole day stay at home watching anime, read manga and wank to those low quality hentai. He keep saying tired tired want to go home, then fell asleep in NYNY. Damn stupid thing to do can. So I bloody cannot take it. I take the condiments (e.g. Pepper, cheese powder, chilli flakes) and spam on his act japanese long pubic hair. There is a video but have to wait for see ler to upload.
After that we were walking in the shopping centre and Hang Ping that noob whose name sounds like humping, don't know drunk or what, tried to spear the act japanese yuantat. He f**king jumped in the air and launched himself at yuantat's ass. WTF. Worse of all he missed and ~!@#$%^ speared into a random passerby. Damn funny can. So in the end go home.
Then at the MRT, I decided that I must go toilet. So I went to the MRT toilet and the MRT toilet outside put a sign. "Toilet closes at 10:30pm, if you have an urgent matter, please contact the MRT staff." WHAT THE F**K! I have an urgent matter and why the hell need to lock toilet!!!! Got people steal the toilet bowl meh!! Wah piang, in the end no mood to pee liao. So go home lor. END OF STORY =D
Oh first time I went to Ion Orchard. Wah damn alot of stalls siah at the B4. The Food Street like heaven like that. Next time I must bring alot of moolah and waste it on the food and grow fat like shit.
Oh ya my birthday 2 more days only. 2 more days to being LEGAL. HELL YES.
After that I went to library and looked at many of the failblog videos out there. Well it consoles me that there are plenty of failures out there in life other than me :)
Then I went to CJC. CJC not bad la, got a bit of chio girls here and there highly recommended by my dear friend See Ler who is probably the horniest guy in CJC. But whatever. Then we were supposed to go pubbing and drink the night away. Happy hour was from 5pm to 9pm and we were supposed to meet at 6pm. But NJC nerds had to take exams until 6:30pm? WTF. So in the end when the NJC nerd, Melvin, finally came to meet us at Orchard it was already 8:30pm. Left half an hour to closing time of happy hour. So we planned to chiong there fast and order like as many pints of beer as possible before happy hour over. But See Ler dressed like some kopi boy at kopitiam. Complete with shirt and CJC pe shorts. Then everyone at the pub was like so "cool". Long story short, we never got into the pub. In the end, we went to New York New york to order some exquisite new york cuisine.
See Ler, like a noob trying to act pro. Want to drink in the end have to go Cold Storage and buy beer. F**king noobshit. So in the end I got a bottle of Corona and See Ler got 2 cans of sapporo, one can of some weird brand and Carlsberg. I ordered Black pepper chicken chop spaghetti. I swear the bloody spaghetti sucks to the core and the chicken chop like those deep fried tempura cardboard you can find at KFC. The spaghetti like those rafia strings that scouts use to tie their rape victims to pole. After that chill at New York New York until closing time. Yuantat that noob shit. His hair long like thai transvestite pubic hair. Act japanese only. Like those noob otaku whole day stay at home watching anime, read manga and wank to those low quality hentai. He keep saying tired tired want to go home, then fell asleep in NYNY. Damn stupid thing to do can. So I bloody cannot take it. I take the condiments (e.g. Pepper, cheese powder, chilli flakes) and spam on his act japanese long pubic hair. There is a video but have to wait for see ler to upload.
After that we were walking in the shopping centre and Hang Ping that noob whose name sounds like humping, don't know drunk or what, tried to spear the act japanese yuantat. He f**king jumped in the air and launched himself at yuantat's ass. WTF. Worse of all he missed and ~!@#$%^ speared into a random passerby. Damn funny can. So in the end go home.
Then at the MRT, I decided that I must go toilet. So I went to the MRT toilet and the MRT toilet outside put a sign. "Toilet closes at 10:30pm, if you have an urgent matter, please contact the MRT staff." WHAT THE F**K! I have an urgent matter and why the hell need to lock toilet!!!! Got people steal the toilet bowl meh!! Wah piang, in the end no mood to pee liao. So go home lor. END OF STORY =D
Oh first time I went to Ion Orchard. Wah damn alot of stalls siah at the B4. The Food Street like heaven like that. Next time I must bring alot of moolah and waste it on the food and grow fat like shit.
Oh ya my birthday 2 more days only. 2 more days to being LEGAL. HELL YES.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
2 weeks after first infection.
Bleargh, I woke up today finding that I've turned into boomer. I totally feel like vomitting and have no appetite. My stomach also very round IDK why. So I decided that it would have easily cured by play CS, then just nice CS only got one server running "Zombie Madness", so I just spent like 2 hours shooting zombies/ killing people. Then I think my photosensitive motion sickness kick in again, I though I had already previously classically conditioned myself liao. But I think is because I undergo extinction. So I got even worst. So I'm like a drunkard walking around the house, vomitting over everything, and banging into everything.
It's almost 1pm now and I still have no appetite for breakfast, brunch, lunch. Die liao, I think I become zombie.
Anyway, I also bought my Razer Sphex!! It's f**king chic and sexy on my laptop table. My Razer Copperhead now no longer single already, now got girlfriend. Soon there will be Razer babies. :D For all those that don't know, Razer Sphex is a high tech, sophisticated gaming grade desktop skin A.K.A mousepad. And the Razer CopperHead is a genre-defining weapon for professional gamers that makes for penetrating, explosive gameplay A.K.A computer mouse. :D
And if you think you've seen the last of Sokchelle... No you haven't! Heh! :D
I'm thinking of having a youtue channel for all our guysFTW production videos. ;) Alright back to vomitting!! :D
Click the link to see sexy photo! :D (Sorry I can't upload pics, blogger is being such a nasty bitch)
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
It lives!
Alright I shall revive this dead blog once again. So here goes.
Then it was the chinese teacher Huang Mei Lian. I was probably her number one most hated student ever. LOL. The expression on her face was like a pig eating hardened shit while having a bad constipation. I ask her to give me chocolates and hongbao + the cute doraemon on her desk, but then she dowan. Then in the far end of staff room, I spotted the teacher that caused my A-maths to fail with flying colours, Mr Paul Lee So I was like from one end of the staff room to the other end shouting "EH LEE! Long time no see siah! I can see the horizon on your receding hairline liao siah!" So he was like all whatevaa. And stuff like that.
Today was teachers day! Freaking awesome. Well I got to meet up with many of my old classmates. As usual, I was still the most handsome of them all. The performance was alright I guess. There was this singer who was singing until very ji dong, then he zao xia. WTF. LOL. Pawned himself right in the face can. Then the next event was Alana koo walking past. Wa lau eh, she's damn hot, especially her two mountains. Cannot tahan la. She is a discipline teacher, so she was scolding this guy. But I bet the guy who was getting scolded was damn shuang la, you can see the blissful pleasure oozing from his face. So after the staring was done, we went to play basketball. Then Hailiang said "WTF LA! You jump like dinosaur liddat!" I mean how the f**k does a dinosaur jump dude. LOL
Then we go see our teachers. So the first teacher I saw was the black teacher from our school, Mr Fernandez. So I was like all "Yo homie! Wassup my nigga? Shizzle my dizzle, my little frizzle!". Then he gave me this weird look and hug me. But of course, I just finished basketball and he was like all freaking out.
Then it was the chinese teacher Huang Mei Lian. I was probably her number one most hated student ever. LOL. The expression on her face was like a pig eating hardened shit while having a bad constipation. I ask her to give me chocolates and hongbao + the cute doraemon on her desk, but then she dowan. Then in the far end of staff room, I spotted the teacher that caused my A-maths to fail with flying colours, Mr Paul Lee So I was like from one end of the staff room to the other end shouting "EH LEE! Long time no see siah! I can see the horizon on your receding hairline liao siah!" So he was like all whatevaa. And stuff like that.
Then after attempting to steal food from the teacher's fridge unsuccessfully I went out and saw Mr Steven Quay. Wa Lau that KNNCCB teacher, say me what "Don't study hard now, later when you receive your results, L1R5 16, then you can only go those lousy JC, you will cry. But that is not tears of joy, you cry is because you see your future POOF in front of you." He even say "Siau Ming Hao, your physics can even get distinction I treat you meal in anywhere you want, even the Ritz Carlton Hotel also can" Walau eh, my O levels physics get A1 I damn happy can, I finally can stuff the paper in his face siah. Damn shuang damn shuang. So when I saw him I was like "Hello, Mr Teo" and he gave me a death glare and then smack me damn f**king hard on my back two times. LOL. So sad I never got to see the teacher that suspend me 3 times, detention me at least 10 times, confiscate my laptop cause I gaming in class for countless of times. I think maybe he leave school already. But heck la.
After that we continue to play basketball in the newly built, damn zai sport hall. But I think I was suffering from indigestion la. I played soccer and volleyball with the people there. The basketball abit too competitive la, sure lose. Then the guys taught me how to do those magic card tricks. Now I can go out and bluff those xiao mei mei liao. They see my tricks, they'll be like "OMG! So good, can I be your girlfriend please?" And I'll be all, "No way, you this kind want to be my girlfriend? Go take queue number please?" LOL okay dreams aside, the guys decided to go eat dinner.
We went to the usual market nearby which usually took like max 10 mins? Maybe only 5 mins. But I took like 30 mins to get there. Why? Because of my freaking stomach. I think stomach flu uh. So I was walking 2 steps then stop for 2 mins then continue walking again. IMBA slow. So the rest of the gang continue forward while Hailiang was like accompanying me throughout. Hailiang! You're the best slut and bitch in the world man. Your the suckiest retard ever. Damn I give such good compliments.
So we eat eat eat (I didn't), then talk alot of crappy stuff like girls, school, girls, girls, beef and DotA. Seriously, I don't understand girls at all man. Oh well, its the common problem every guy faces. Damn. So after that we went J8, walk around, then go arcade. There's this f**king lame game called "King of Animals". WTF, there was like a lion fighting a shark. Then the lion got some cool move called "Turbo spin" hahaha wtf, reminds me of the option button on my washing machines. Then there was also a stingray, floating in midair, in the middle of Africa, fighting a leopard. WTF. And you had to purchase those card thingies to play. WTF ARE THE KIDS THESE DAYS PLAYING? WHERE HAVE SOCCER, BASKETBALL AND BARBIE DOLLS GONE TO?
Oh well, after that I went to buy my Razer Sphex. Coolio mousepad man. Now my Razer Copperhead got girlfriend liao. Woooo. NICE.
So after that it was home for us. Oh yeah Ramly beef is damn fattening but damn sinfully good man. DAAYUMMM. Oh yeah, meeting JM tomorrow for secret present for Irwin. As if the CB 185 dollar diecast Ferrari 1985 GT wasn't enough.
The fun only begins when it goes overboard.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
To the nice guys in the world! This is for you!
This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in DotA to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor.
This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.
The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative b**ches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete a** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.
So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, insane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.
This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.
The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative b**ches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete a** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.
So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, insane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Pump up the bangra!!
Horoscope for today!!
Yesterday I worked at Sheraton. Usually I would have a long anecdote on all the fun and funny things that happened. But this was totally different.
Alright first of all, I had worked at Meritus Mandarin the previous day. So when I went home, I was super tired, but then when I went home I just couldn't sleep. So I used the comp until the wee hours of the morning. Barely sleeping for a few hours, I was rudely awaken by the fingers of my mother wrapped around my neck shaking my head vigorously. There was a loud crack and then I woke up. I fumbled around the house like a drunkard who was drunk. Ate my breakfast then went back to sleep. Halfway through my dream with super hot Megan Fox, I heard this voice of telling to wake up and go for work. I opened my dreamy eyes and glanced towards my cock. oh waitt.... I meant clock. I saw that it was going to be 5pm in like 5 mins and so I clicked the eject button on the side of my bed and blasted towards the toilet, showered, changed and was out of the house in 30 mins. By the time I reached Sheraton Towers, the shower I had taken before was nullified, I was sweating like a sweaty marathon runner at the 41.99km mark. So I rushed in and wanted to sign in. Then I glanced at the office clock and saw that the time was actually not even 5pm!! I mistook 4pm to be 5pm!! Arrrghhh.... When can I stop this blurness?!
And so I signed in at 4pm (Even though I came in at like 4:30pm), and decided to go down for dinner first. When I went up, everyone gathered and readied themselves for role assignment and attendance marking. And so they called names one by one (No not those distasteful nicknames, REAL names). Weirdly my name wasn't called. I checked with the captain, I ran my eyes up and down the names list so fast that the friction between my eyeballs and eyelids practically accumulated to the extent that my balls were on fire. But even then, there was no "Shawn" or "Ming Hao". I was horrified. My heart floated on the oncoming gush of half digested dinner rising up my oesophagus and finally ended in my mouth. Some 'Made-in-China, Myanmar, Vietnam and other places where babies are born with cunningness and slyness' asshole went to cancel my name from the Shift List and decided to conveniently add in his own name. Unfortunately, that asshole was smart enough to erase all traces of evidence.
And so I was on the verge of getting sent back home. Luckily there was food tasting in one of the function rooms called 'Pearl Room'. I was to be the runner, to run up and down from Second Level to Basement Level 1 collecting the dishes from "*** Bai's Kitchen". Okay la the kitchen is called 'Li Bai's Kitchen'. So everyone was going smoothly, I was to collect dishes after dishes. When it came to the Sea Cucumber and Abalone dish though, there was a little mishap. I was supposed to take the lift from Basement 1 to Level 2, so I was there waiting for the lift. Then as the lift came, and I was walking into the lift, for no reason the lift doors just closed on me. And *floop*, two sea penises were flying in the air, spilling all their gravy everywhere. As they wobbled on the floor of the lift I thought to myself, "This time GG". But of course, I wouldn't let this tiny obstacle stand in my way. I picked up the 2 slippery, slimy sea penises and placed them back on the dish. 化险为夷 Disaster solved! YAY! V(^-^)
So by 9pm, the food tasting was done. Then me and another girl called Bei yi (She was the server) ,cleared everything then slacked with the captain in the 'Pearl' room. Slacked there reading newspapers, talking about random stuff and eating durian cake for like 1 hour. Then we went up to the 3rd level to set up the 'Turqouise' room for a lunch meeting tomorrow. Set up liao then got nothing to do, so from 11pm to 1am, just sat in the room, doing nothing. Walked around level 3 aimlessly too. Level 3 was empty at that time, so it was just me and Bei yi. Explored all the offices and stuff. Found a super cool christmas tree in one of the office. Talk about security issues man. The door wasn't even locked. After that went to the pantry and drank F&N Outrageous Orange, then drank milk. Then found the cookie jar but unfortunately, it was empty. :( Went down to the cafeteria. Took the condensed milk and made a super sweet drink. I just love super sweet stuff. Bei yi took a sip and immediately spitted it out, claiming that it was way too sweet. But I found it okay lei. haha. So we went back up to the 'Turquoise' room and slacked the remaining hours away.
TODAY WAS THE SLACKIEST DAY I'VE EVER WORKED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. But the bad part about being slacky is that it is insanely boring. Imagine 2 people sitting in a room looking at each other with nothing to say.
And oh yeah, Orchard Road mobbing later!! Woo wee wow!! :D
And I just realised that I laugh too much and smile for utmost no reason.
And I still can't let go of you. Yet.
Oh yeah the female captain at Meritus is super funny. Steam sea bass can be pronouced in her hands as 'Steamed sea bun'. I mean, WTF is a SEA BUN? LoL. Anyone show me what's a sea bun please. =)
"There will be no such thing as sensory overload for you today -- every stimulation, sound and sight will feed your mind in an exciting way. It's a great day to go exploring! Unusual food, bizarre music, and foreign movies are just the ticket for your intellectually curious mind. Do something you have never done before, eat something you've never eaten before, or listen to something you've never heard before -- you will wake up tomorrow a better person for doing so."
'Intellectually curious mind', so to Kaimin, Constance, Priscilla and all my other friends who keep asking me why I have those weird questions. THERE YOU GO! :D
Now onto things that happened yesterday.
Yesterday I worked at Sheraton. Usually I would have a long anecdote on all the fun and funny things that happened. But this was totally different.
Alright first of all, I had worked at Meritus Mandarin the previous day. So when I went home, I was super tired, but then when I went home I just couldn't sleep. So I used the comp until the wee hours of the morning. Barely sleeping for a few hours, I was rudely awaken by the fingers of my mother wrapped around my neck shaking my head vigorously. There was a loud crack and then I woke up. I fumbled around the house like a drunkard who was drunk. Ate my breakfast then went back to sleep. Halfway through my dream with super hot Megan Fox, I heard this voice of telling to wake up and go for work. I opened my dreamy eyes and glanced towards my cock. oh waitt.... I meant clock. I saw that it was going to be 5pm in like 5 mins and so I clicked the eject button on the side of my bed and blasted towards the toilet, showered, changed and was out of the house in 30 mins. By the time I reached Sheraton Towers, the shower I had taken before was nullified, I was sweating like a sweaty marathon runner at the 41.99km mark. So I rushed in and wanted to sign in. Then I glanced at the office clock and saw that the time was actually not even 5pm!! I mistook 4pm to be 5pm!! Arrrghhh.... When can I stop this blurness?!
And so I signed in at 4pm (Even though I came in at like 4:30pm), and decided to go down for dinner first. When I went up, everyone gathered and readied themselves for role assignment and attendance marking. And so they called names one by one (No not those distasteful nicknames, REAL names). Weirdly my name wasn't called. I checked with the captain, I ran my eyes up and down the names list so fast that the friction between my eyeballs and eyelids practically accumulated to the extent that my balls were on fire. But even then, there was no "Shawn" or "Ming Hao". I was horrified. My heart floated on the oncoming gush of half digested dinner rising up my oesophagus and finally ended in my mouth. Some 'Made-in-China, Myanmar, Vietnam and other places where babies are born with cunningness and slyness' asshole went to cancel my name from the Shift List and decided to conveniently add in his own name. Unfortunately, that asshole was smart enough to erase all traces of evidence.
And so I was on the verge of getting sent back home. Luckily there was food tasting in one of the function rooms called 'Pearl Room'. I was to be the runner, to run up and down from Second Level to Basement Level 1 collecting the dishes from "*** Bai's Kitchen". Okay la the kitchen is called 'Li Bai's Kitchen'. So everyone was going smoothly, I was to collect dishes after dishes. When it came to the Sea Cucumber and Abalone dish though, there was a little mishap. I was supposed to take the lift from Basement 1 to Level 2, so I was there waiting for the lift. Then as the lift came, and I was walking into the lift, for no reason the lift doors just closed on me. And *floop*, two sea penises were flying in the air, spilling all their gravy everywhere. As they wobbled on the floor of the lift I thought to myself, "This time GG". But of course, I wouldn't let this tiny obstacle stand in my way. I picked up the 2 slippery, slimy sea penises and placed them back on the dish. 化险为夷 Disaster solved! YAY! V(^-^)
So by 9pm, the food tasting was done. Then me and another girl called Bei yi (She was the server) ,cleared everything then slacked with the captain in the 'Pearl' room. Slacked there reading newspapers, talking about random stuff and eating durian cake for like 1 hour. Then we went up to the 3rd level to set up the 'Turqouise' room for a lunch meeting tomorrow. Set up liao then got nothing to do, so from 11pm to 1am, just sat in the room, doing nothing. Walked around level 3 aimlessly too. Level 3 was empty at that time, so it was just me and Bei yi. Explored all the offices and stuff. Found a super cool christmas tree in one of the office. Talk about security issues man. The door wasn't even locked. After that went to the pantry and drank F&N Outrageous Orange, then drank milk. Then found the cookie jar but unfortunately, it was empty. :( Went down to the cafeteria. Took the condensed milk and made a super sweet drink. I just love super sweet stuff. Bei yi took a sip and immediately spitted it out, claiming that it was way too sweet. But I found it okay lei. haha. So we went back up to the 'Turquoise' room and slacked the remaining hours away.
TODAY WAS THE SLACKIEST DAY I'VE EVER WORKED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. But the bad part about being slacky is that it is insanely boring. Imagine 2 people sitting in a room looking at each other with nothing to say.
And oh yeah, Orchard Road mobbing later!! Woo wee wow!! :D
And I just realised that I laugh too much and smile for utmost no reason.
And I still can't let go of you. Yet.
Oh yeah the female captain at Meritus is super funny. Steam sea bass can be pronouced in her hands as 'Steamed sea bun'. I mean, WTF is a SEA BUN? LoL. Anyone show me what's a sea bun please. =)
Friday, December 19, 2008
Delving into life's mysteries
Dear Reina,
To provide people with answers to the questions to their futures and to earn a quick buck, some smart guy decided he would create something called a horoscope and scam senseless people out of their life's savings and 棺材本. That 'something' is called the horoscope. Soon this spread like wildfire and almost anything and everything can be used to predict futures. From the lines on palms, to the position of fat moles on faces, down to the leftovers from coffee cups.
However with the advent of the Internet, such scams now do not scam people of money. That would be pointless since everyone is so rich. So some guy decided he could dominate the world by controlling the minds of senseless brainless people through horoscopes. Of course he wasn't the only one who came up with the bright idea. And thus the power struggle of world domination by computer geeks who are really fat asses who have no life, clad in boxers and have bottles of pee and faeces surrounding them, BEGUN.
Whatever.
My horoscope from the ooh-so-user-friendly friendster is.... *Drumroll*
To provide people with answers to the questions to their futures and to earn a quick buck, some smart guy decided he would create something called a horoscope and scam senseless people out of their life's savings and 棺材本. That 'something' is called the horoscope. Soon this spread like wildfire and almost anything and everything can be used to predict futures. From the lines on palms, to the position of fat moles on faces, down to the leftovers from coffee cups.
However with the advent of the Internet, such scams now do not scam people of money. That would be pointless since everyone is so rich. So some guy decided he could dominate the world by controlling the minds of senseless brainless people through horoscopes. Of course he wasn't the only one who came up with the bright idea. And thus the power struggle of world domination by computer geeks who are really fat asses who have no life, clad in boxers and have bottles of pee and faeces surrounding them, BEGUN.
Whatever.
My horoscope from the ooh-so-user-friendly friendster is.... *Drumroll*
"When you see a chance to get ahead today, you just have to take it! Save all of the deep and meaningful (and time consuming) contemplation for another time. You are in a phase of your life when you need proactive action, not passive reflection. Let yourself get comfortable with the idea that you can't hit a home run every single time that you step up to bat. Aiming for a perfect score every time isn't realistic, and you could be setting yourself up for disappointment."
Alright what's there point of me showing my horoscope to you together with such a long intro? Well the point is... well there isn't. =D
Okay, yesterday I was working at Meritus Mandarin again. Well, it was a wedding. I'm beginning to hate weddings. hahaha I don't know why. All those love songs playing and stuff. Can't take it. :S Yesterday I did 2 tables. One table was filled with those rich taitais with super fat fingers adorned with rings. The other was a even mix of mothers, aunties and those old tikopek who keep ogling at the plunging neckline of the ooh-so-sexy women from the opposite table. There were 2 imps who were determined to make my night as bad as possible. Arrghh! 我忍！！！
And so the rich taitais, whose body figures resembled that of a well-fed slug, slowly sashayed into the ballroom. I wonder how they even keep their balance. Their body figure defies the laws of physics. Perhaps those rings on their juicy fat fingers help to keep their center of gravity low.
At first glance they may seem to be those kind, generous, philanthropic ladies. But once their fat asses touched the satin chairs, they revealed their true colours. "AH BOY!!! One plate of chili PURLISS!" "WAITER!! KOUK PLIS!!" "PEE NATS PRIS!" OMG, one request came after another. Finally when all their requests (Or demands I should say) have been fulfilled, I collapsed, there was barely a breath left in me. I was a remnant of my former-self. Tortured by the evil taitais to the point of balancing on the cliffs of death. Poor me :(
But that was not yet! I still had another table to attend to!! So using the power granted to me by guan yin, I summoned my last breath to stand up and attend to that table. There were 2 kids at that table, I thought to myself, "Great... Kids for dinner >:)" But I was to regret those thoughts later. THOSE WERE DEVILS!! Cleverly disguised in the form of kids to trick poor Banquet waiters like me! I wondered to myself, what have I done to deserve such treatment!! Firstly they asked for coke, then for sprite, then for straws. Then an uncle asked for beer and then an auntie ask for warm water. And guess what all the requests were made one by one. I suspected that the old tikopek in white was the mastermind of all this. Trying to test my patience! But I'm SHAWN SIAU MING HAO! Banquet waiter of Meritus Mandarin! Surely I can take the trials of the rich taitais, old tikopeks and devils disguised in the form of innocent children! So in order to take a coke, a sprite, 2 straws, one beer and one glass of warm water, I had to run 6 times back and fro from the bar. And it was not as if I was situated near the bar. I was situated right smack at the end of ballroom 3!! I think I ran 2.4km just to complete all my requests. Finally when all the teacups were filled, requests done, flowers cleared, table numbers placed away, I thought to myself, "wheeeww". Then the black manager came to me and said, "oi oi oi!! What you doing?! PICKUP PICKUP!!"
I whispered vulgarites and cursed my luck. So I obidiently went into the kitchen for pickup. So things were going as usual. Clearing plates and changing plates. Then one of the rich taitais went to knock out a glass of red wine and it splashed all over 2 rich taitai's. I guess her fingers were just too fat and probably got into the way. So I had to go change her napkin for her. I went to gave her the napkin I used to wipe the dishes. hahaha. Hey you can't blame me right? I couldn't find any more napkins anywhere mar.... So things continued as usual. But the rich taitais kept asking me to change their teacups because the tea went cold. I was like can't you just drink like 10ml of cold tea and then I can help you pour in hot tea instead of me running to the sink to pour away the cold tea and then refilling it with hot one for you? Then came to the abalone dish. Then I just placed it on the table and some guy from another table said he will serve it for them. He's not a waiter btw, he's a guest. So I let him serve lor. Then I went to take bowls and spoons for the preparation of the sweetest course <3!!
Then I came back and to my horror, the lady said that she had abalone sauce on her ooh-so-expensive silk blouse. She kept pointing to her fake breasts and kept saying; "POWDER POWDER!! I WANT POWDER!!" I was like wtf? You want chilli powder issit? Or pepper or?
In the end, what she really wanted was TALCUM powder. I have no idea wtf spamming talcum powder on a abalone sauce stained ooh-so-expensive silk blouse can help. The blouse probably became worst the way I see it. Became a total mess. Rich taitais, seriously don't even know that 爽身粉 is called Talcum powder? If they don't know it's 爽身粉, I'll understand since not many people know that, but TALCUM powder, how can you not know?! I knew that since I was like in primary school!! Even if you didn't know, don't you read the labels on the products you buy?! Okay, maybe they have maids to buy for them, so I suppose their maids would have a higher Intelligence Quotient than them.
Then William had to interrogate me about that incident. Obviously I would not have been so dumb as to spill abalone sauce on a guest. But William still spent like 5-10 mins interrogating me :S That made me like the 2nd slowest waiter. I was actually one of the faster ones la. In the end, become one of the slower ones.
Now the dessert. The dessert was really special today, it was some sweet concoction of papaya, yam paste and lots of milk or something. I think it was coconut milk. It was super aromatic, but also super hard to serve. The yam paste is like some super sticky glue. Very hard to serve. But in the end I still managed to serve all. Have to use the bowl's spoon to scrape the paste out of the ladle. I laughed at those waiters who tried to let the sticky yam paste slide into the bowl from the ladle. But of course, apart from laughing, I also went to help them la. :)
Well, all was not bad. In the end, there was a bowl of dessert leftover by the guest. So after clearing my cups, plates and utensils, I snuck the bowl into the kitchen and dug in! I've never seen such a dessert before and it tasted as sweet as it looked! Super yummy <3!!
After that I went home with Pearlyn, Yuhan and Junwei. I really have to thank Yuhan though, she helped me with the tables when they first came in and did so many requests. So we went on the red line train and went home.
So that is one day at Meritus Mandarin summarized in one blogpost. :D
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
FRIEND ZONE
The friend zone is one of the oldest and most common traps that women set up to trick gullible losers into an eternity of mental enslavement. The stage is set for the friend zone when the woman is already in a relationship with a real man. As often as 13 year old boys need to curse and swear or watch porn, girls just have to whine about something; therefore she tries to whine to her boyfriend. Being an Alpha Male the guy has better things to do than listening to her complaints about how insensitive he is when he leaves the toilet seat up, how he doesn't call enough, and other crap nobody cares about so he tells her to shut the hell up. Of course after a while of this she will start hemorrhaging angst and will desperately need an emotional tampon to soak it all up. This is when she will lure in a spineless nice guy for her to brutally shove into a bloody cesspool of emotional baggage called the Friend Zone.
The Trap:
The trap consists of a girl feigning interest in some vulnerable beta male whimp.
Part 1 (the mind screw): She will start flirting with the guy until he shows visible signs of becoming hopelessly in love with her. When the guy starts to flirt back, she will suddenly ignore him causing uncertainty which will make him think he's "going too fast" so he will back down. She will then repeat the same thing ad nauseum.
Part 2 (the milking): During the now unbreakable cycle she will tell him all her angst and nonsense while saying lies to keep him interested:
* "Thanks for listening, you are such an angel."
* "Why can't more guys be like you?"
* "You're so cute!"
* "My boyfriend is so mean.... you would make the perfect man."
* "I Heart You" or "I luv you"
* "You are like a brother to me."
She will also hint for him to buy stuff for her which the idiot will. Basically she will milk him for as much attention, hugs, and gifts for as long as she can keep this game up. The guy's belief in these lies will lead to him always being stuck in the friend zone and will cause the incurable "permavirgin" status.
When he asks her out
When a guy actually gains the courage to ask her out she will keep him in by just saying "I'm not ready for a relationship right now", or "I'm not entirely sure of my own feelings" (hinting that there might be hope later), and thus the cycle continues.
OR
She will admit that she wants to be just friends (which is just 1 level of hell less to endure). But it doesn't end there, no sir. When she misses all the gifts and is in need of another emotional sponge, she will go right back to crying on his shoulder and saying how "My BF and I going through a rough time, and I think we're going to break up". She will then show interest in him again, but this time around when he asks her out again she just has to say "Him and I are broken up, but I still have feelings for him...... I'm so confused!" and continue to pine for her old boyfriend while restarting the cycle once again.
OR
She will agree to date him, then unexpectedly call it off at the last minute. The dumb loser won't connect the dots and continue to pine after the upstanding young lady. By the time he figures it out, he's graduated high school and is alone in the basement. *sounds of crying*.
Why do they do it?
Since the advent of feminism women have incorporated the concept that they are more equal than men in life. As such, men have grown up in an environment where women are worshipped and honored because men are so afraid of making a mistake in their opposite sex relationships. Think of it like a dog/owner relationship. All women, at their core, are filthy idiots. This isn't an insult, because it's true. It's science. If someone is a male and finds themselves pining over a girl because she is willing to honor their failure of an existence on this earth with an AIM message once a week asking for computer help or to borrow a few hundred bucks so that she and her boyfriend could rent a cherry picker and make out outside your bedroom window, that person would be only too happy to provide her with said provisions because in their delusional state of neckbearded virginity they think that somehow it will lead to her loving them. In truth, that virgin is her property, not the other way round.
Is There Hope?
NO. There is no hope. You have a better chance of singlehandedly bringing peace to the Middle East than breaking free of the friend zone and dating her. Contrary to what compliments she has given you she would rather take a .357 magnum to the head than to even think about actually dating you.
Well, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. Just like you admitted to jacking off to crap you have finally taken the first step to admitting you are one gullible dumbass who is an embarrassment to the male gender. So to get out follow these steps:
1. Violence.
2. Get it in your head that you got played like a fiddle, and you must forget about her.
3. Become "interested" with secunda, and talk to prima about how perfect secunda is, and show a complete loss of intrest for prima. 50% chance that her jealous will drive her to rethink your status, otherwise she will stop leading you on and find another sucker... win:win situation
4. Don't talk to her ever again. Communicating with her will compromise your chances of getting out.
5. Block her from MSN, Myspace, Facebook, and everything else you can think of Screw it. Just unplug your internets.
6. Unplug your phone.
7. Burn your house down, change your name and move to Canada.
Things to say when they call
Alternatively, one can attempt to escape by using one (or all!) of these suitable responses when a woman attempts to use their siren-song on the unsuspecting ears of a lowly virgin:
1. No, I refuse to help you! Good day!
2. Only if you [insert explicit activity].
3. What are you wearing?
4. I know I've never mentioned this before, but I'm hung like a pringles can.
5. Only if you give me a blumpkin.
6. Let's have a sleepover instead!
7. You know, I just came back from my tantra course. They taught us how to give women 45 minute orgasms.
8. Still on the pill?
9. Sure, but before that I want to test out this new swing I installed in my basement.
The Inconvenient Truth
But seriously folks when you really get down to the facts, the said amount of girls who deliberately sap guys for attention & gifts is extremely overblown. This is because the internet is this gigantic cesspool of angry permavirgin nerds who blame all their failures with women on women by furiously typing their rage-induced sob stories and posting it on their blogs, message boards, & imageboards. These are the kind of spineless morons think that if a girl says "Hello" to them, or if they buy a gift for a girl, that suddenly entitles them to sex and if they are turned down they complain that she "Friend Zone'd" or "Led him on".
It's the age-old mentality that can be summed up as the "Nice guy" syndrome: Claiming to be such a "Nice", "Sensitive" and "Caring" guy only to get into a womans pants; but is very quick to turn around and call her a "Whore" and" "Slut" the second she turns his sorry ass down, while being completely oblivious to the irony of their own statements. It's one of the biggest examples of victim complex in the Internets today.
The raging crapstorm continues when these guys make this claim that everyone who does get laid by the said girls are a "assholes", or that "girls are only attracted to assholes". This is total nonsense of course and is just more whining to make the supposed nice guys feel all comfortable in their gross ignorance.
As you can see, actual instances of the so called "Friend Zone" are rather rare and most are told by nice guys (and if you do fall into a trap of a women sapping you for attention; your damn fault for falling for such an obvious trap and hope you actually learn from the experience). We would give you some further PROTIPS: in life but you are probably too butthurt by being told the truth you don't want to hear. In fact, keep your immature behavior up, keep blaming women for your inability to get laid, you will just make it easier for the rest of us. Have fun comforting yourself by memorizing the Ladder theory and buying yourself that fleshlight. I'm sure it's as good as the real thing.
Moving on.
Alrighty, I have to *try* to put things behind me and move on. I've created a list of stuff to occupy myself next week!
1. Orchard road mobbing on Sunday
2. Street soccer, Basketball!!
3. Learn to backflip off a wall.
4. Go professional with yoyo again.
5. Probably try play dota professionally again or something.
6. Sing sing sing.
7. Dance dance dance.
8. Watch Twilight on my own, I have to get used to doing things alone.
9. Practice freestyle on soccer.
And finally
10. Forget.
10 things to do next week, hopefully it can take my mind off certain stuff.
1. Orchard road mobbing on Sunday
2. Street soccer, Basketball!!
3. Learn to backflip off a wall.
4. Go professional with yoyo again.
5. Probably try play dota professionally again or something.
6. Sing sing sing.
7. Dance dance dance.
8. Watch Twilight on my own, I have to get used to doing things alone.
9. Practice freestyle on soccer.
And finally
10. Forget.
10 things to do next week, hopefully it can take my mind off certain stuff.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Fate?
Or perhaps just pure coincidence?
I was wondering about this topic. Does everything that happens in the world planned by someone of a higher order? It's like you throw a ball into the air, you know it is going to go up, stop, then come back down. You can know exactly what is going to happen. It's simple physics, you know the variables and the constants and therefore able to predict what is going to happen.
But what about the more complicated stuff? Let's talk about chance or "probability" in mathematical terms. Is it possible to predict what a person would throw in a simple game of scissors, paper, stones? Theoretically if you knew all the variables, it would be possible. But the human brain is a complex instrument. There is far too many variables to be able to predict it. Although there can only be 3 outcomes. It is almost impossible to predict with 100% accuracy.
There is this demon called Laplace's demon. It is a hypothetical "demon" such that if it knew the precise location and momentum of every atom in the universe then it could use Newton's Laws to reveal the entire course of cosmic events, past and future. So if this demon knows all the variables, he is able to predict everything. If such, then what do we live our lives for since everything is planned?
It is something that we possess called FREE WILL. It gives us a tiny but potent chance at denying fate. It's the reason why we don't all run in a straight line. That's why we don't obey the laws of physics. That's why we are humans. It is what make us, us.
I was wondering about this topic. Does everything that happens in the world planned by someone of a higher order? It's like you throw a ball into the air, you know it is going to go up, stop, then come back down. You can know exactly what is going to happen. It's simple physics, you know the variables and the constants and therefore able to predict what is going to happen.
But what about the more complicated stuff? Let's talk about chance or "probability" in mathematical terms. Is it possible to predict what a person would throw in a simple game of scissors, paper, stones? Theoretically if you knew all the variables, it would be possible. But the human brain is a complex instrument. There is far too many variables to be able to predict it. Although there can only be 3 outcomes. It is almost impossible to predict with 100% accuracy.
There is this demon called Laplace's demon. It is a hypothetical "demon" such that if it knew the precise location and momentum of every atom in the universe then it could use Newton's Laws to reveal the entire course of cosmic events, past and future. So if this demon knows all the variables, he is able to predict everything. If such, then what do we live our lives for since everything is planned?
It is something that we possess called FREE WILL. It gives us a tiny but potent chance at denying fate. It's the reason why we don't all run in a straight line. That's why we don't obey the laws of physics. That's why we are humans. It is what make us, us.
当你
如果有一天，我离你遥远
不能再和你相约，你是否会发觉我已经说再见？
当你的眼睛眯着笑
当你喝可乐当你吵
我想对你好，你从来不知道
像你想你，也能成为嗜好。
当你说今天的烦恼，
当你说夜深你睡不着，
我想对你说，
却害怕都说错。
好喜欢你， 知不知道？
如果有一天，梦想都实现
回忆都成了永远， 你是否还会记得昨天？
如果有一天，我们都发觉原来什么都可以，
无论是否，你还会停留在这里？
也许空虚让我想得太多，
也许该回到被窝。
梦里会相遇，就毫不犹豫
大声地说：“我要说。。。 好喜欢你，知不知道？”
Weird... You're not supposed to even mean this much to me.
不能再和你相约，你是否会发觉我已经说再见？
当你的眼睛眯着笑
当你喝可乐当你吵
我想对你好，你从来不知道
像你想你，也能成为嗜好。
当你说今天的烦恼，
当你说夜深你睡不着，
我想对你说，
却害怕都说错。
好喜欢你， 知不知道？
如果有一天，梦想都实现
回忆都成了永远， 你是否还会记得昨天？
如果有一天，我们都发觉原来什么都可以，
无论是否，你还会停留在这里？
也许空虚让我想得太多，
也许该回到被窝。
梦里会相遇，就毫不犹豫
大声地说：“我要说。。。 好喜欢你，知不知道？”
Weird... You're not supposed to even mean this much to me.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Happy CNY!!
Aiyah... CNY lai liaoz... nvr even came near my computer... Again lots of things have happened this week. First the good news:
1. I have been promoted to Admin status on Zion yay!! Below is a message from the Frog himself! MrFrog!
Hehehe... Beware users... ...
Promotion of {Xiao}Hao
Ever since {Xiao}Hao has dedicated his time and effort to help the users , most of the users have told me that {Xiao}Hao is a great helper and has been there to help when needed, and because he has helped alot of people and good performance in #zinc, i hereby promote {Xiao}Hao as an admin from effect of 6 Feb 2008 12:00pm. Keep up the good work, {Xiao}Hao and hopefully you can train your own helpers in the future and pass on what u have.
2. Morning Musume CDs spotted at J8!! YAY!! 2 of them actually, Ikkimashoi and No.5 Not sure if there was more, because I was going to catch CJ7 and did'nt have time to browse through the whole collection... I'm going to buy them tomorrow :)
Ikkimashoi
No. 5
3. Lots and lots of HongBao money!!
My ah ma and ah gong gimme 400 each.. :)
Now for the bad stuff.
1. My hard drive left 114mb of space... Damn sad right?
2. The above 2 singles do NOT consist of Tanaka Reina :(
3. The above 2 singles do NOT consist of Tanaka Reina >: (
4. The above 2 singles do NOT consist of Tanaka Reina (I mean seriously la... What is a single without Tanaka Reina? It's like a toilet bowl without the toilet bowl cover. It's like a human without an anus... *yuck*)
5. The above 2 singles do NOT consist of Tanaka Reina
Enough liaoz... Shall sign off now...
Monday, February 4, 2008
woah pain....
Today was the last day of the exams.... (this time really finish, me no lies to you) You should have seen the English HOD smiling viciously at us after the papers were collected la... "You all want to get out of here right?... hehehe... Lemme give you a long speech on examz.... Woah sibei buay tahan...
After that we chiong back to class.... I thought that the classroom was locked so I removed the window panes to climb in... then dunno why RongYang walk to the classroom inside and say "hello <3" I was like WTF?! RongYang!!! You got special powers too?! You can phase through walls? I only telekenises (Sorry la dunno how to spell) Then he said that the blardy classroom door this time nvr lock... T.T
Then we got our weekly subscription of the Straits Times then I saw this article "Pornshops report a rise in business" (Actually it's pawnshops la XD) Other than that there was nothing much liaoz la... oh yeah, I also tried pronouncing our Finance Minister's name but to no avail... It was some taman shamugarathan or something.... After our english teacher went out of class everyone started to do whatever we monkeys do best. I try to learn hand stand... But it resulted in my almost breaking my butt... Now my right buttcheek is friggin pain... Now pangsai also damn hard... the pangsai always slide off my leftcheek. LoL And I tink someone went to throw Goh Kee Yong's (Yes he is my father... I can call him that) shoes into the school's Koi fish pond... HAHAHA...
Anywayz, after school we went to the basketball court to play basketball (All because of the Hak Boon, building wad sports hall.... build over the track somemore...) anyways we were there playing and me limping around the basketball court due to my paralysed right buttcheek... And so we play and play then shout at the Whitley people who were being dimissed.... I swore one of them was stalking me home la... I think she/he/it really likes me (Who does'nt?? 我是人见人爱的嘛) Either that or he/she/it is trying to kill me... I've padlocked all my windows liaoz... So no worryz... Tomorrow dunno want take MC ornot... later he/she/it waiting outside for me la...
Well... I cycled HaiLiang to J8... It felt almost like 不能说的秘密, except is the BrokeBack version la... So now I am here, with a paralysed right buttcheek, typing this time-wasting blogpost...
So signing of DarkwinteR
Friendster: www.friendster.com/littlehao
MSN messenger no emails please: fyreblaze@hotmail.com
Emails please: darkwinter.shawn@gmail.com
After that we chiong back to class.... I thought that the classroom was locked so I removed the window panes to climb in... then dunno why RongYang walk to the classroom inside and say "hello <3" I was like WTF?! RongYang!!! You got special powers too?! You can phase through walls? I only telekenises (Sorry la dunno how to spell) Then he said that the blardy classroom door this time nvr lock... T.T
Then we got our weekly subscription of the Straits Times then I saw this article "Pornshops report a rise in business" (Actually it's pawnshops la XD) Other than that there was nothing much liaoz la... oh yeah, I also tried pronouncing our Finance Minister's name but to no avail... It was some taman shamugarathan or something.... After our english teacher went out of class everyone started to do whatever we monkeys do best. I try to learn hand stand... But it resulted in my almost breaking my butt... Now my right buttcheek is friggin pain... Now pangsai also damn hard... the pangsai always slide off my leftcheek. LoL And I tink someone went to throw Goh Kee Yong's (Yes he is my father... I can call him that) shoes into the school's Koi fish pond... HAHAHA...
Anywayz, after school we went to the basketball court to play basketball (All because of the Hak Boon, building wad sports hall.... build over the track somemore...) anyways we were there playing and me limping around the basketball court due to my paralysed right buttcheek... And so we play and play then shout at the Whitley people who were being dimissed.... I swore one of them was stalking me home la... I think she/he/it really likes me (Who does'nt?? 我是人见人爱的嘛) Either that or he/she/it is trying to kill me... I've padlocked all my windows liaoz... So no worryz... Tomorrow dunno want take MC ornot... later he/she/it waiting outside for me la...
Well... I cycled HaiLiang to J8... It felt almost like 不能说的秘密, except is the BrokeBack version la... So now I am here, with a paralysed right buttcheek, typing this time-wasting blogpost...
So signing of DarkwinteR
Friendster: www.friendster.com/littlehao
MSN messenger no emails please: fyreblaze@hotmail.com
Emails please: darkwinter.shawn@gmail.com
Friday, February 1, 2008
終了！
FINALLY!! After months of intensive mugging (Not really months but hours :P) it's finally over... No I've not taken the O levels... It's just my prelim 1.... Lots of things have happen over this past week.
1. My Creative Zen has just been to where all tech devices go (Michael Jackson's Neverland... Yes Michael does do USB ports too... Well it's somewhere you can plug something into right? ;) ) I hope it's enjoying its stay there... Well long story short, Windows has Blue Screen Of Death, Zen has White Light. ( Do not look at the white light!! Run away from it!!) I believe it's some prophecy that GoD gave to me... Armageddon is coming... Beware everyone... Start building your Arks now.
2. I found out that I can do a wall run. It can take 3 steps (MAX) on a wall and reach a height of about 3 metres? Quite cool heh? *SpiderMan music plays* It all started when a spider bit me...
3. The "Sun Wu Kong" tried to confiscate my Zen... He said I have to get B3 for A-maths in order to not let him get my Zen... That bladdy Zenophile. He wants to screw my Zen :(
4. I learnt 2 new pen spinning techniques...
5. I suddenly can mime...
I also just brought my Zen to the bloody Customer Care Centre... Customer Care your HEAD! Sweets also dun have... Call wad customer care...
So I was grabbing my Zen like it was the Ring of Sauron and slowly walked into the forsaken land of Creative Customer Care... The chief saw me coming and whispered to the his partner, "wah... look... This time sure die liao one." As he took my Zen with shaky hands, he placed it on the table and fainted and started foaming at the mouth... His companion follow suit but he foam in the nose... I also dunno why. So I played with the little bell on the table... Quite fun to play... *Ting ting tiiiiinnnng ting ting tinnggg* Then the CEO suddenly chiong out say, "WHO THE F**KING C**O C**E BYE PLAYING WITH THE BELL AGAIN!! I TELL HOW MANY TIMES LIAO!! WORKING CANNOT PLAY WITH THE... Aiyah... beri solli sir.... My minions beri the toopid one *Lifts one worker and puts him through the shredder* How can I helps chu sir? *Lifts the other one and put in the shredder* " I told him my Zen had the "White Light" "WTF!?! Your Zen gotch e White Light? Liddat die liaoz, your Zen ah... must cast back to the fire of the Mount Doom ah... Need take at least one week ah... The bird fly beri the slow... so not my problem"
So that is it... The bird is on it's way to Mount Doom!! Bladdy Creative, why can't they use Airplanes instead? =P
1. My Creative Zen has just been to where all tech devices go (Michael Jackson's Neverland... Yes Michael does do USB ports too... Well it's somewhere you can plug something into right? ;) ) I hope it's enjoying its stay there... Well long story short, Windows has Blue Screen Of Death, Zen has White Light. ( Do not look at the white light!! Run away from it!!) I believe it's some prophecy that GoD gave to me... Armageddon is coming... Beware everyone... Start building your Arks now.
2. I found out that I can do a wall run. It can take 3 steps (MAX) on a wall and reach a height of about 3 metres? Quite cool heh? *SpiderMan music plays* It all started when a spider bit me...
3. The "Sun Wu Kong" tried to confiscate my Zen... He said I have to get B3 for A-maths in order to not let him get my Zen... That bladdy Zenophile. He wants to screw my Zen :(
4. I learnt 2 new pen spinning techniques...
5. I suddenly can mime...
I also just brought my Zen to the bloody Customer Care Centre... Customer Care your HEAD! Sweets also dun have... Call wad customer care...
So I was grabbing my Zen like it was the Ring of Sauron and slowly walked into the forsaken land of Creative Customer Care... The chief saw me coming and whispered to the his partner, "wah... look... This time sure die liao one." As he took my Zen with shaky hands, he placed it on the table and fainted and started foaming at the mouth... His companion follow suit but he foam in the nose... I also dunno why. So I played with the little bell on the table... Quite fun to play... *Ting ting tiiiiinnnng ting ting tinnggg* Then the CEO suddenly chiong out say, "WHO THE F**KING C**O C**E BYE PLAYING WITH THE BELL AGAIN!! I TELL HOW MANY TIMES LIAO!! WORKING CANNOT PLAY WITH THE... Aiyah... beri solli sir.... My minions beri the toopid one *Lifts one worker and puts him through the shredder* How can I helps chu sir? *Lifts the other one and put in the shredder* " I told him my Zen had the "White Light" "WTF!?! Your Zen gotch e White Light? Liddat die liaoz, your Zen ah... must cast back to the fire of the Mount Doom ah... Need take at least one week ah... The bird fly beri the slow... so not my problem"
So that is it... The bird is on it's way to Mount Doom!! Bladdy Creative, why can't they use Airplanes instead? =P
Sunday, January 27, 2008
1st Blog POST!!
Well... I'm going to try creating a blog just for fun... Now... what do I write?
Lemme do an introduction of myself first then...
I am a man that goes by many names... Most people know me as {Xiao}Hao OR DarkwinteR
Well... I love to game especially DotA but my love for DotA has been slowly dying down.... But do msg me for a game though!! I like J-pop too and especiallyモ～ニング娘 (Morning Musume), probably mostly because of Tanaka Reina XD I am learning japanese too... Self-learning...
I am pretty short and that sucks... only 165cm tall!! >.<
I weigh around 60kg...
I have studied for god-knows how many years in an All-boys school... That sucks... (Really)
If any gals wanna ask me out NO PROBLEM!! ;) My MSN is Fyreblaze@hotmail.com and Friendster is www.friendster.com/littlehao
I like to surf forums, (forum.zinc.sg, Hello-online.org, Hardwarezone.com etc etc) I pretty ok at computer stuff... Trying to learn some mirc scripting and PHP stuff... (I'm still a noob at it LoL) Well if you constantly surf the ZINC forums, you would have came across my thread somewhere XD Leave a comment ok? I still use mIRC and I am usually on GameSurge server (Channels: #Binders, #Dotarian, #DraftZone, #MapRequest, #MoTD, #snoopyx, #twit, #vAmpirism, #ZincHelp, #Zinc) and also on the Galaxy.net server (Channels: #cOngx.com, #leens.com, #notdam). You can also pm me on any of the above mentioned forums, my username is DarkwinteR on most forums and {Xiao}Hao on mIRC. Well, that's it for now... Gotta prepare for Social Studies and Chemistry tomorrow >.< *DIES*
I should'nt even be here LoL!
Lemme do an introduction of myself first then...
I am a man that goes by many names... Most people know me as {Xiao}Hao OR DarkwinteR
Well... I love to game especially DotA but my love for DotA has been slowly dying down.... But do msg me for a game though!! I like J-pop too and especiallyモ～ニング娘 (Morning Musume), probably mostly because of Tanaka Reina XD I am learning japanese too... Self-learning...
I am pretty short and that sucks... only 165cm tall!! >.<
I weigh around 60kg...
I have studied for god-knows how many years in an All-boys school... That sucks... (Really)
If any gals wanna ask me out NO PROBLEM!! ;) My MSN is Fyreblaze@hotmail.com and Friendster is www.friendster.com/littlehao
I like to surf forums, (forum.zinc.sg, Hello-online.org, Hardwarezone.com etc etc) I pretty ok at computer stuff... Trying to learn some mirc scripting and PHP stuff... (I'm still a noob at it LoL) Well if you constantly surf the ZINC forums, you would have came across my thread somewhere XD Leave a comment ok? I still use mIRC and I am usually on GameSurge server (Channels: #Binders, #Dotarian, #DraftZone, #MapRequest, #MoTD, #snoopyx, #twit, #vAmpirism, #ZincHelp, #Zinc) and also on the Galaxy.net server (Channels: #cOngx.com, #leens.com, #notdam). You can also pm me on any of the above mentioned forums, my username is DarkwinteR on most forums and {Xiao}Hao on mIRC. Well, that's it for now... Gotta prepare for Social Studies and Chemistry tomorrow >.< *DIES*
I should'nt even be here LoL!
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